April 2021 - Girl A by Abigail Dean

Sadly not read, but listen.

I can only get it as audio book.

Truth be told, I don't have the best experience with audio books, but I'll give it a go, just so I can have something else to do that proof-read my manuscript

I started today. Got the time for it while my manuscript is with the editor.

Not sure what I had expected. Since I'm listening to the audio, it's a different experience I get. Do like the one who reads it. Her male voices sound silly, but in over all her voice is pleasant to listen to. It's the actress Holliday Grainger, who reads the book. She does a fairly gook American accent, hehehe.


First impression of the story: It was a bit confusing at the beginning for me, but I did other stuff that required mild brain activity, so couldn't concentrate on the story. Was better when I was outside doing some gardening. I like the shift between past and present of Alexandra's life. It's giving me the chills of what those kids had to go through growing up.

Currently at chapter 3.

1. How did this book make you feel? What emotions did it evoke?

Mainly annoyance and sadness. Not a jovial read by any means.

2. Were there any quotes or passages that stood out to you?

Early on in the book after Alexandra escapes and she's in the hospital reflecting on the questions not asked by the people helping her 'Why did you not leave when you had the chance?', She says, "it wasn't so bad" and then describes the good things she remembers. This stood out to me simply because I think it's so true that people can show amazing resilience in the midst of their 'normal', when others say "I can't even begin to imagine".

3. Did your opinion of this book change as you read it?

Yes, I really didn't think I was going to be able to read it all at first. Using poverty is such a stereotypical theme to use in a book about abuse and then throwing in a religiously fanatical parent to add to the cliche's just felt lazy and unnecessary. I still think this to be honest but neither ended up being the focus of the book and I was able to see past that in the end and getting to a place where I could read it without feeling annoyed.

4. If this book were to be made into a movie, who would you cast to play the grown Alexandra & Ethan Gracie.

I think Freya Allan would make a good Alex.
Not really sure about a good Ethan but I think Timothee Chalamet would be awesome as Gabe.

5. What did you like most and least about the book?

I least liked the fact that the book didn't really bear any resemblance to the plot I thought I was going to be reading about regarding the opening of the community centre and the aforementioned cliches.
I most liked reading about what happened to each of the Gracie siblings.

6. What did you think of Dr K's methods of psychology, particularly around the lie that was told to Alexandra regarding Evie?

I thought that lying to Alex about Evie was quite unprofessional. One thing to evade answering, but quite another to out and out lie. Having said this, at least Dr K stuck around in Alex's life for a long time and was able to deal with the fallout.

7. What character or moment prompted the strongest emotional reaction for you and why?

Charlie Gracie prompted the strongest emotion for me and it was anger when he killed himself rather than face the consequences of what he'd done. I always struggle with any plotline when my strong need to see justice isn't fulfilled.

8. What were your final thoughts about Alexandra's parents? Do you think that her Mum was a victim too?

I felt Charlie Gracie was a controlling, selfish man who clearly struggled with failure and then hid behind the bible while completely missing the point of it.
I had more sympathy for Deborah Gracie who appeared to also be a victim and was maybe made a scapegoat for justice after her husband killed himself. We were not subjected to anything of the court case but given that she got a long term sentence, I imagine that we can take that to mean that she must have had ample opportunity to get help for her children and didn't take it. Given that 2 children died, she definitely has to bear a good portion of the blame.

9. What were your final thoughts about Ethan?

Initially, I just saw him a scared as the rest of the Gracie children but then as the storyline progressed and we got to learn more about him, I felt he was weak and did the least to help his siblings and kept his own neck off the block. Judging by Alex's parting shot at the wedding, it's clear that the intimation was that the apple may not have fallen too far from the tree and there was potential for him to be an abuser too.

10. Would you recommend this book?

No! Apart from the fact that I just didn't think it was 'that' good, I think it's unwise to recommend any book that deals with abuse, particularly the abuse of children.

Other Thoughts:

I rather naively didn't expect the book to be so focused on how the Gracie siblings dealt with their own personal trauma of what happened to them. I thought that this would be touched upon early in the book and then the main plot would be how they came together to turn the 'house of horrors' into the community centre and the healing that might bring.

Even now, I'm not sure how I feel about reading fictional accounts of abuse. I think, having worked with and cried with people who have experienced abuse it was hard for me to react in an emotional way to fictional characters experiencing it (Hope that makes sense). I suppose I'm saying that if people really want to gain insight and understanding of the long term impact of abuse, then I would suggest reading a true life autobiography where emotional impacts will at least be more authentic.

Completely understand why you gave up Susanne. It was tough with the book but I think I would have been too easily distracted if I'd been listening to it.